Travel Jokes Humor and Satire
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      • No Speed
        03/31/07
        A woman, new to boating, was having a problem. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get her brand new 22-ft Bayliner to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power she applied. After about an hour of try

      • Buttons
        03/30/07
        On a flight to Los Angeles, a gentleman had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but it had always been occupied. The flight attendant noticed his predicament. "Sir, she said, "You may use the ladies room if you promise not to touch any of the buttons on the wall.&qu

      • Blind Pilots
        03/29/07
        One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner were seated waiting for the cockpit crew to show up so they could get underway. The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane, and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle.
        Both appear to be b

      • Wife Fell Out
        03/27/07
        On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

        Featured by Resources For Attorneys, a legal resources and li

      • Road Work
        03/24/07
        A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along b

      • Stop Sign
        03/23/07
        A man was driving down a local street one day and approached a stop sign. He barely slowed down and ran right through the stop sign after glancing for traffic.

        What the driver didn't know was that a policeman was watching the intersection. The policeman pulled out after him and stopp

      • Truck Drivers
        03/22/07
        In a very small alley two trucks driving in opposite directions meet.

        As the drivers are equally stubborn, neither of them wants to reverse.

        They angrily look one at the other.

        Finally, one of them picks up a newspaper and starts reading.

        The other one pol

      • Dead Rabbit
        03/21/07
        A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road

      • Deaf Lady
        03/19/07
        One day a lady was driving on the Highway. She frequently checked her speed gauge to make sure she stayed within the speed limit. However, when she looked into her rear mirror, much to her dismay, she saw a police car not far behind! And, to make matters worse, the police car turned on his flashing

      • Wrong email.
        03/18/07
        A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and

      • Train Stop.
        03/17/07
        A man travelling on a train ask the ticket collector what time the train stops at Victoria.

        "This train doesn't stop at Victoria, it's the express."

        "You are joking!, I NEED to get off at Victoria!"

        "Sorry sir. This train will not s

      • Big in Texas
        03/16/07
        A Texan lands in Sydney for the Olympics, and is picked up by a taxi. After requesting a tour of the city, he starts into a tirade about the small town airport and how in Texas they have larger runways on their ranches...

        They are soon crossing the Sydney Harbor bridge, and the man is fu

      • Natalie
        03/14/07
        The Madam opened the brothel door to see an elderly Jewish man. His clothes were dishevelled and he looked needy.

        "Can I help you?" the madam asked

        "I want Natalie," said the old man.

        "Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies, perh

      • Sunbathing
        03/12/07
        Sharon, who was a rather well-proportioned secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day, but on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.

        She'

      • Stupid Questions.
        03/10/07
        Cruise ship stories.

        1. (For this one, you have to know that it's really easy to get lost in the maze of corridors and elevators on a ship.) A lady asked if this elevator went to the front of the ship.

        2. Two elderly women were staring at the numbers of the floors listed a

      • Religious Passenger
        03/09/07
        A plane full of retirees headed for Florida was gripped with fear when the pilot announced, "Two of our engines are on fire; we are flying through a heavy fog and it has eliminated all our visibility."

        The passengers were numb with fear, except for one - a retired minister. &qu

      • Phenomenal Memory
        03/08/07
        An Australian travel writer touring Canada was checking out of the Spokane Hilton, and as he paid his bill said to the manager, asked, "By the way, what's with the Indian chief sitting in the lobby? He's been there ever since I arrived."

        "Oh that's 'Big

      • Columbus
        03/06/07
        We all know that Columbus believed the world was round when others believed it was flat and that if you traveled far enough you would go over the edge. We also know that Columbus reached what we now know as America. While there are still a few who believe Columbus returned to Spain and told Queen Is

      • Expensive Hotel
        03/05/07
        A husband and wife are traveling by car from Atlanta to New York to. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road

      • Snob Tourist
        03/04/07
        A snobbish tourist was visiting a small Australian village when he noticed a local man wearing a highly ornate necklace that featured 10 alligator teeth. He approached the man and in a condescending manner said, "Goodness, what a fancy necklace! I guess you people must value alligator teeth the

      • Nothing to worry about
        03/03/07
        While cruising at 40,000 feet, the airplane shuddered and Mr. Tanner looked out the window. 'Good lord!' he screamed, 'one of the engines just blew up!'

        Other passengers left their seats and came running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet a

      • Seeing Eye Dog
        03/02/07
        After a 45-minute delay our flight took off, however, unexpectedly, it stopped in Sacramento. The flight attendant explained that there would be another 45-minute delay, and if we wanted to get off the aircraft, we would reboard in 30 minutes.

        Everybody got off the plane except one gent

      • Slow Train
        03/01/07
        A passenger train is creeping along, slowly.Finally it creaks to a halt.

        A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. "What's going on?" she yells out the window.

        "Cow on the track!" replies the conductor.

        Ten minutes later, the train re

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